Happiness, at the speed of life 2

Retirement Stats, Studies, and Stuff
Guest Writer:  Catherine M. Miller, IAC-MCC
Cultivating Wellness

Finally!  Bountiful, beautiful, bright white snow!  I am just back from my favourite winter recreational activity – cross country skiing – the first outing of the season.

During the first few minutes of skiing, I was caught up in the joy of good companionship, the natural beauty of my surroundings, and the rhythmic feeling of pole, kick and glide.  Some five minutes later, however, I stopped abruptly in my tracks.

My thoughts were whirling and ping-ponging all over the map – from planning tomorrow to wondering what to make for dinner tonight, ruminating over an unresolved concern, thinking about a project…and then…Look at that – my friends were far ahead of me!  Along with all the inner babble, my inner critic jumped in with its comparisons and judgements: You’re not as fit as them… You’re going to hold them back… Why do they have to ski so fast?

But I want to take in the beauty of my surroundings as I go… a quieter inner voice spoke up. But you’re not! interrupted my inner critic – You are just plain slow.  Here I was outdoors, doing one of my favourite things, and I was missing it all!  I was feeling stressed and disappointed.  And disconnected – from myself, my surroundings, and my friends.

Tending our soul’s estate

Maybe you can relate to this experience.  Oh, how our human minds like to dwell on the past, ruminate on things, and plan for the future!  And, yes, that capability has its useful place, but left to its own devices it can cloud over a perfectly sunny day.   This is just as true in the daily experience of retirement as it is in a recreational moment.

For most of us, retirement’s allure is one of having more time and freedom to choose and do those things that give rise to feeling happy, content, and maybe even more at ease as we go about our day.  Retirement gives us a fresh opportunity to tend to our ‘soul’s estate.’[a]

Our set happiness level

And yet, being retired does not automatically guarantee this will happen – or that we will feel happy doing those things!  Why not?

Well, worldwide research has found that, despite what we tend to think, despite what the home, recreation, or travel ads want us to think, our circumstance, location and activity play a surprisingly minor role in our level of happiness.  Where we are and what we are doing account for only some 10% of our happiness.  An individual, genetically pre-determined set or resting point accounts for approximately 50%.  This is the level of happiness we automatically return to even after major setbacks or triumphs.⁵

The part we can control

The part that is within our control, that accounts for the remaining 40% of our happiness level, is our overall attitude and intention, and our moment-to-moment choices – how we choose to think, to act, and to interact.⁵   From the moment we notice what is going on in our minds, we have the uniquely human ability to directly impact how happy we feel.  We already do this unconsciously every moment of our waking lives – for better or for worse.³   What we choose to do with that 40%, can make the difference between a sunny and a cloudy day.

What happy people have in common

With a few tips from our scientific researcher friends, we can have more say in how happy we feel any time of any day.

So, let’s start with the question ‘What is happiness?’  We each have our own sense of what happiness is, based on our personal experience.  According to positive psychology researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky, it is considered to be “the experience of joy, contentment, or positive well-being, combined with a sense that one’s life is good, meaningful, and worthwhile”⁶.

Photo: Catherine Miller – The joy of sunshine on a -26° C morning

From her research⁵, here is a sampling of key attitudes and behaviours she found consistently in the happiest people.  You may very well enjoy many, or all, of these too.

1. They devote a great amount of time to family and friends, nurturing and enjoying their relationships.
2. They are comfortable expressing gratitude for all they have.
3. They are often the first to offer helping hands to coworkers and passersby.
4. They practice optimism when imagining their futures.
5. They savor life’s pleasures and try to live in the present moment.
6. They make physical exercise a weekly and even daily habit.
7. They are deeply committed to lifelong goals and ambitions (e.g., fighting fraud, building cabinets, or teaching their children their deeply held values).
8. Last but not least, the happiest people do have their share of stresses, crises and even tragedies. They may become just as distressed or emotional in such circumstances as you or I, but their secret weapon is the poise and strength they show in coping in the face of challenge.

Hardwired ‘mind-clouds’

It is helpful to note that even the happiest people do not practise all of the above or necessarily do these things all of the time.⁵  They too are human!  Also helpful to understand is that happiness or a rise in happiness level is not guaranteed by any one or combination of these attitudes and behaviours.⁵  This is because something, ever so easily, can get in the way.  That ‘something’ is our mind running on autopilot.  Item # 5 – to ‘savor life’s pleasures and try to live in the present moment’ – can be a surprisingly challenging thing to do, or to sustain for more than a second or two.

It is surprising to most of us, when we begin to pay closer attention to what is going on in our heads, to notice how fleeting our positive thoughts and feelings are… especially compared to how lasting our negative thoughts and feelings are.  We humans think far more than we believe we do, and most of this thinking is absorbed in things that have already happened or that might happen or will be happening – in other words, absorbed in the past and the future.

In addition, for most of us, our focus of attention and thoughts during the day are oriented to problems, concerns, fears, and anxieties. There is a survival reason for this.   The human brain is ‘hardwired’ with a negativity bias – it has evolved to be alert to potential threat.  This was helpful for the survival of our ancient ancestors but is outmoded for us today.³ These days, the brain’s negativity bias fosters and/or unnecessarily ramps up unpleasant emotions such as anxiety, anger and fear, highlighting past losses and failures, downplaying present abilities, and exaggerating future obstacles.⁴  In today’s world, no longer on the lookout for saber-tooth tigers, our evolved propensity for negative and stress-inducing thoughts now undermines our mental and physical health and our happiness.⁴

The science behind it

Returning to that skiing experience, for a time I was caught up in my mind – caught up in ‘hardwired’ habits of planning, thinking, worrying, and judging.  I was not tending to my soul’s estate. Besides interfering with my enjoyment, those ruminating thoughts and emotions of frustration were directly and negatively impacting all systems in my body. Stress hormone production, such as cortisol, immediately increased and coursed through my body, and the ‘fight, freeze, or flight’ sympathetic nervous system jumped into action.^3,8,9

This physiologically aroused state generated by our less than happy thoughts – known to us as stress –  is such a common experience for most of us these days that it can feel like ‘the norm’.  The ensuing hormonal and autonomic nervous system imbalance, however, generates chaotic signals in and between our heart rhythm patterns and brain, and on to all our body systems, typically resulting in impaired mental functioning, drained energy, escalated negativity/negative cycling and decreased mental and physical performance.^3,9,10

On the other hand, positive emotions and, even more so, each positive emotion genuinely felt, create a cascade of psychological and physiological benefits that have an immediate and direct impact on changes in our mental processing, neural structures, and our body’s physiology: they improve our cognitive, emotional and physical functioning. ^2,3,8,9

The more we prioritize positive emotions in our life, the more readily we notice and convert good experiences and events into good feelings. ¹   And the good feelings have both immediate and long-term benefits: they convert into a brighter outlook, more robust cardiovascular system, better functioning immune system, fewer chronic pain conditions and stronger relationships. ⁷

The result: when we think positive thoughts and feel positive emotions, our body and brain work better, they work better together, and we feel and perform better.

We know this from our own experience: life, even with its challenges, seems to go more smoothly, and feels richer, when we are in a positive frame of mind.  Now science can explain what is going on in our mind, brain, and body that contributes to this experience and what is going on that gets in the way.

Having a better understanding of how our thoughts and emotions directly affect our body gives us a different perspective and possibly a new reason to check in periodically and to choose to savour what feels good and to re-prioritize our train of thoughts – to steer toward a change in focus – if our current one is undermining our health and well-being.

Putting the science into practice

As an example, when I noticed the tone and occupation of my thoughts and how they were clouding my real life experience while skiing, I used a quick combination of reliable practices to clear my mind.  I replaced the thinking that was exciting my negative emotions, with feeling genuine appreciation for my natural surroundings – like dialing in to a different radio frequency.  As I soaked up the sun’s warmth on my upturned face and smelled the ‘freshness’ of the cold air passing through my nostrils, I could feel the effect this shift in focus had on my hormonal and nervous systems.  I felt a sense of calm returning and a lift in my energy and outlook, my posture straightened, I was looking forward rather than down, and upon rejoining my friends I easily kept pace with them. I was back tending to my soul’s estate.

Well-being in 12 seconds

There is compelling evidence that ‘we can use our mind to change our brain’s hardwiring to change our mind for the better’.³ We can use our knowledge, awareness, and conscious choices to change the neural pathways, to change what’s going on in our inner experience – our beliefs, assumptions, and reactions – for the better.^3,10

You and I can train our brain and change our mind to have stronger and more positive pathways and networks that contribute to our happiness, calm, and health. And we can build those pathways 12 seconds at a time.³ All kinds of positive things happen during our day – most without our really noticing. If we were to take 12 seconds to really notice them, to savour and soak in them, our well-being networks would light up and multiply. Like a muscle, the more often we exercise those neural pathways of well-being, the stronger and more automatic they become.

This is neuroplasticity –  the brain’s capacity to learn and thus change itself – mostly through small neural changes made from repeated mental activity that add up over time.^3,4,10

The more mindful we are of our positive thoughts and feelings – that is, the more attention (duration, frequency, quality) we place on our positive thoughts and feelings – the greater our impact on changing our brain for the better and thus our happiness and health.^3,4

The fresh opportunity retirement brings

Retirement offers a fresh opportunity to choose what we want to do and how we want to feel.  Responses to a small research interview initiated for the purposes of informing this article suggest that with retirement comes the opportunity to re-prioritize priorities – more to one’s own preferences and needs – and follow through on them.  For example, we can choose to ‘Prioritize Positivity’¹ in our daily lives by deliberately planning situations that naturally give rise to positive emotional experiences, such as happiness.

The sun is always shining even though we cannot see it on a cloudy day.  Unlike the weather outside, we can change the weather inside.  We can blow some or all of those clouds away to bring more sunshine into our day.  When we notice we’re ramping up unhappy feelings, we have a choice: we can choose to feel happy instead.  Sometimes it takes effort, and sometimes repeated effort, to be sure, but we are capable of taking back the reins on our runaway thoughts and emotions and steering them on a surer course toward our greater health and happiness.

And now we also have a practical tool:

• focus in the present moment…
• soaking up the good.

Food for thought

If you would like to raise your level of happiness or experience more of your happiness more often and for longer periods of time, you might find the following questions interesting to consider:

What tends to bring forth your happiness?

At the beginning of each day, do you have something you look forward to?

What one small thing might you change in your day that would invite a happier experience?

What might you enjoy savouring for 12 seconds, or longer, today?

How might you remind yourself to notice, pause, and savour?

To your good health and happiness.

REFERENCES

1. Fredrickson, B. L. (2013). Love 2.0: Creating happiness and health in moments of connection. New York: Penguin Group.
2. Fredrickson, B. L., Cohn, M. A., Coffey, K. A., Pek, J., & Finkel, S. M. (2008). Open hearts build lives: Positive emotions, induced through loving-kindness meditation, build consequential personal resources. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 95(5), 1045–1062.
3. Hanson, R. (2013). Hardwiring happiness: The new brain science of contentment, calm and confidence. New York: Harmony Books.
4. Hanson, R. & Mendius, R. (2009). Buddha’s brain : The practical neuroscience of happiness, love and wisdom. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, Inc.
5. Lyubomirsky, S. (2008). The How of Happiness: A scientific approach to getting the life you want. New York: The Penguin Express.
6. Lyubomirsky, S. What Is Happiness? http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/topic/happiness/definition#what_is
7. Lyubomirsky, S., King, L., & Diener, E. (2005). The benefits of frequent positive effect: Does happiness lead to success? Psychological Bulletin (131) 6, 803. doi: 10.1037/0033-2909.131.6.803
8. McCraty, R. & Childre, D. (2002).The Appreciative Heart: The psychophysiology of positive emotions and optimal functioning. Boulder Creek, CA: HeartMath Research Center, Institute of HeartMath, Publication No. 02-026.
9. McCraty, R., & Shaffer, F. (2014). Heart rate variability: New perspectives on physiological mechanisms, assessment of self-regulatory capacity, and health risk. Global Advances in Health and Medicine, 4(1), 46-61.
10. Siegel, D. J., (2007). The mindful brain: reflection and attunement in the cultivation of well-being. New York, NY: W. W. Norton & Company.

[a] Henry David Thoreau (1817-62). U.S. philosopher, author, naturalist. Journals (1906), entry for 11 Feb.1840. “He enjoys true leisure who has time to improve his soul’s estate.”