Following Frank into Retirement – 5 months into it
A series of articles starting 5 months from retirement and into retirement
By Frank
Time. I’ve got the gift of time. Unfortunately there is an expiry date to this gift, so I want to spend it wisely. The use of one’s time brings to mind many metaphors, some with rather disturbing undertones. For example, my wealth of time could be viewed as the first Europeans saw Canada’s mighty white pine forests. They believed that there was enough pine to last over 500 years. It was mostly gone less than 200 years later. Will I have much less time than I think I have right now? In my dotage, I don’t want to have the feeling that I wasted my time. Should I be using my time to ensure a lasting legacy? What does leaving a legacy really mean? If I don’t leave a legacy, does it mean that I’ve squandered my time? Do I care? My head hurts. Good thing I’ve got lots of time; I’ll think about it later.
Procrastination made easy
It is really easy to procrastinate since my available time to do chores has increased from two days a week to seven days. I’ve looked at some of the jobs around our home and have left them because the weather hasn’t been perfect or the bugs were too voracious or it was just too much work to get started or I just didn’t feel like doing anything.
Oddly enough, having lots of time also makes it harder for me to procrastinate. Since I have so much time available, I am very aware of the procrastination potential. Having no real reason not to do the chore (and having lots of time), I just do it. It is a little weird in that the positive reinforcement that I get from not procrastinating makes me even keener to tackle things immediately.
Transmogrifying “should” into “want”
In my last blog, I was bemused over my reluctance to pursue activities that I actually enjoyed doing, such as cycling and playing music. My first thought was that if I made cycling and music part of my daily routine, then I would ensure that I did both. This past month, I have been cycling and playing my practise chanter and French horn regularly. However, it was not through a rigid scheduling of these activities that this was accomplished. With a whole day to choose from, I allowed myself the freedom to wander into these activities when my muse moved me. It is in my mind each day that I would like to cycle and play music (or cook or read) and so, when the impulse grabs me, I go with the flow. Sure it still takes a bit of a push to hop on my bike, but it is no longer something I should do. I want to do it.
This flexibility in scheduling also has benefits in doing those chores I mentioned above. I don’t have to cut the grass in the evenings or weekends; I can cut it when it suits me best. No planning is necessary – if I feel like doing it, I just do it. I’m even starting to enjoy tasks that were sheer drudgery before retirement. The grass getting too long to cut is no longer a problem. I enjoy having our yard looking trim and inviting (although if I ever start fussing over our lawn, please just shoot me).
A living legacy
I borrowed the above title from the Ontario government’s forestry policy wonks. In our province, “a living legacy” refers to supporting industry and communities based on Ontario’s renewable forest resource. My own personal living legacy policy is less clear (those of you familiar with the challenges in forestry policy will realize that means I really don’t have a clue). I suspect that this is the subject area that will be the major battleground between me, myself, and, I during retirement.
Are our kids our legacy? We’ve certainly expended much love, effort and expense getting them through to adulthood (and will continue to do so). I have all this available time; shouldn’t I be doing something worthwhile with it? My ingrained (you could say ingrown) work ethic is clamouring for me to be productive. Wouldn’t it be nice to be remembered as someone who actively contributed to the community, helped those in need, or founded an empire?
Wait a minute! Did I just notice my ego sneaking into the fray? If I’m thinking in terms of legacy, then it is basically an ego trip. Maybe it is the word ‘legacy’ to which I take exception. I don’t need to be remembered. When I’m about to ‘shuffle off my mortal coil’ I want to feel at peace with my life, with few, if any, regrets. I’m not quite sure how to achieve this goal, but I’m positive that it doesn’t include words like ‘must’, ‘should ’ and ‘need ’. So I’m going to concentrate on “want to do” and see what sort of person emerges. I could be a friggin’ saint or evil incarnate. Regardless, I will be truly me.
I’m envying your ability to choose not to feel pressured. I do notice you haven’t mentioned being struck with an urgent wish to do paper work. I still harbour the idea/illusion/hope that once I get will and finances and end-of-life decisions made, and paperwork done, then I’ll feel more liberated. Oh, dear. Good thing I’m off to the cottage and not taking any paperwork!
Hi Ann,
I didn’t mention paperwork because I am blessedly free of paperwork. I had a spate of paperwork to do on retiring with regard to transferring my pension out of my employer’s pension plan, but other than that the next flurry of forms shouldn’t occur until I turn 65.
Since my spouse Suzanne, worked at a law office and got free legal services while employed there, our thriftiness forced us to update our wills and Power of Attorney documents before she retired last November. We are also fortunate that neither our finances nor our legal documents are very complicated. Suzanne has difficulty with end-of-life discussions and decisions so it was tougher for her than for me. We still have to arrange for our funerals, but that too should be fairly simple once I can get Suzanne to think about it.
In your position, I’d be tempted to set aside a week to bash through it all and have one bad week instead of having it hanging over you for an extended period. Hope it all goes well. Enjoy this excellent weather at your cottage.
Frank